


'Til The Cows Come Home

by echoflowertea



Series: Open Requests [40]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, Female Reader, Reader Is Not Frisk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-24
Updated: 2017-03-24
Packaged: 2018-10-10 00:15:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10424994
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/echoflowertea/pseuds/echoflowertea
Summary: A weekend with your nephew didn’t sound so bad to the skelebros. Maybe they should’ve read more parenting books.





	

**Author's Note:**

> **prompt** : Hi! I have an idea for a prompt! I know I'm a day late, so no rush whatsoever and feel free to take it or not :) It's for a Sans/Readr/Paps. Your sister and her husband have to be away for the weekend or smth and ask you to take care of their baby/toddler (whatever you think fits best for the story). So they take the child to your house where you live with the bros, but then you have to go out for a bit to take baby things, and they are left alone with the kid. They freak out, funny times ensue
> 
> it's my birthday! have this ridiculously late update as my apologies for such a long absence!

“So you guys really don’t mind?”

“OF COURSE NOT. WE ARE EXCELLENT COMPANY. YOUR PRECIOUS NEPHEW WILL FINALLY KNOW WHAT IT IS LIKE TO BE CARED FOR PERFECTLY! WE HAVE PREPARED THE ULTIMATE DAY OF ULTIMATE FUN FOR SUCH AN OCCASION.”

You shot him a halfhearted smile. Papyrus’ confidence almost always made you feel better, but you were a little nervous about this. It wasn’t as if you didn’t trust the brothers, but they could be a little…eccentric. As far as you knew, neither of them were well-versed in caring for a child, let alone a human one. Both were still vastly impressed and disgusted with your bodily functions, which you could control, so having an unpredictable toddler around the house for the day seemed like…

“heh, don’t stress yourself so much. we got this.”

You observed them. Papyrus had on his child safety gear prepped, which included taping a lot of pillows to his body so none of his joints would end up hurting anyone. Because the brothers were…literally skeletons, they had some parts that jutted out and could poke or stab if you weren’t careful enough. Papyrus would dress himself up in attire that spoke volumes about how gently he was going to treat this kid.

“Awesome. Thanks, guys. I know that this is kind of last minute.”

Your nephew was supposed to come by next week, but his mom and dad had some major things come up. Some business trips got moved around, some flights cancelled, and you were their last hope. You didn’t mind so much, but you were going to run it by your boyfriends first. This was a relationship founded on open and honest communication, after all.

“SO WHEN SHOULD WE EXPECT HIM TO ARRIVE?”

You glanced at the clock. “In a few hours. When they get here, I’ll introduce you.”

Sans grinned and shoved his hands in his pockets, the pinpricks of light in his sockets flaring to life. “we’re gonna have lots of fun.”

“You’d better not corrupt my nephew, Sans. If he learns a pun from you, I’m breaking up with you.”

“heh heh heh.”

In the short time before your nephew was dropped off, you and Papyrus perused through the house to make sure everything dangerous was put away. Anything knee-high was blocked off or sealed up. Papyrus was the one who crawled around on his hands and knees to make sure you didn’t miss anything, while Sans’ idea of helping was to give half-assed words of encouragement from the living room couch.

The doorbell rang and you did your best to brush the dust bunnies out of your hair before you answered. Sans beat you to it, having shuffled over clad in his signature slippers and that harmless smile on his face.

Your sister looked down at him and inhaled sharply, a little baffled at his presence. She had only ever seen him get up from the couch to his seat at the dining table when they stopped by for dinner, so it must’ve been a shock to see him up and about.

“Hi, Sans.”

“heya. c'mon in.”

Your sister paused and glanced over her shoulder. From this angle, you could see a pair of small, chubby hands wrapped around her leg.

“Sweetie, it’s okay.” She bent down to scoop him up and he clung to her upper half, squeezing tight and burying his face in the crook of her neck. “Sorry, guys. He just woke up from a nap so he’s kind of grumpy.”

“He’s also never seen the new house before. Or met the skelebros,” you ventured. “Sans, Papyrus, this is Moo.”

“MOO?”

The toddler glanced up with shining eyes at the sound of his name. On top of his head was a spotted, black-and-white cap complete with floppy ears and tiny horns.

“He likes cows.”

“oh my god.” Sans succeeded in holding in his laughter.

His mom and dad came in for just a few minutes. They’d done their best to tell Moo that he would be staying with you, and considering you were his favorite aunt, he was totally cool with that. But the two strangers were still a little bit of an unknown for him, so he stuck to his mom’s side the entire time.

“He should be okay until dinner. I’ve got a bunch of spare clothes for him just in case he has an accident, but he should tell you when he needs to go.”

“You’re potty-trained, Moo? You’re such a big boy!”

He nodded and took a step away from his mom. The both of you continued to chat while Moo decided to explore the rest of the house on his own. His bare feet resting along the hardwood floors, he squatted down to inspect a pair of shiny sneakers that belonged to none other than Papyrus himself.

“HELLO! I SEE YOU’VE SPOTTED MY SHOES! WOULD YOU LIKE TO TRY THEM ON?”

Moo plopped down in response. Papyrus was happy to join him on the floor. Instead of tearing his shoes off, he instead pulled apart the laces and loosened them up enough for the canvas material to stretch out.

Papyrus tore them off one by one and grinned. “THERE WE GO, AND HERE YOU ARE. GIVE THEM A TRY.”

Moo looked down at his feet and raised a leg up.

“think he wants you to put ‘em on, bro.”

“OH!!! OF COURSE. HOW SILLY OF ME. HERE YOU ARE, KING MOO. THE MOST DELICATE OF SLIPPERS TO ADORN YOUR FEET.”

You had to admit, it was adorable as hell. He and Papyrus seemed to be okay with each other. And although Sans didn’t want to admit it, he was keeping an eyesocket on both of them to make sure that nothing happened. If anything, it was more of a precaution for what-ifs rather than just him being overprotective. Because, like you said, kids were wild sometimes and could snap at any moment.

Proud of his new shoes, Moo did his best to push himself up and balance despite his feet being wayyy too small inside. Papyrus kept a gentle hand on his back while he flopped on over to his parents to show them what he’d done.

“Oh, Moo! They look great on you!”

He beamed, proud of his work. “Mama! A pitcher!”

She fished out her phone and snapped one of him. He stretched out to grab it before she could even bend down to show him, marveling at the screen and swiping left and right. How kids adapted so quickly to technology these days was beyond you.

It only took a few more minutes before his parents left. You kissed your sister on the cheek and saw her off, promising that Moo would have a great time with you and the bros.

Well. Unfortunately, it looked like the one thing your sister forgot to pack were snacks.

You thought you would be prepared for this kinda thing. But after rushing to the kitchen once Moo started going on about wanting his favorite juice – pear, as it was – you realized that none of what you bought earlier in the week was going to suffice. In fact…as you rummaged through the empty boxes of cereal stuffed in the cabinets, you realized that you were completely cleaned out. What the hell!

“Sans, where are the fruit snacks in the shape of animals?”

“the frooty tooties? ate ‘em.”

“MORE LIKE HE CHEWED THEM UP UNTIL THEY WERE SQUISHY AND THEN USED THEM AS POSTER PUTTY TO HANG HIS NEW BLUEPRINTS UP!”

“Please tell me that’s a lie.”

“that’s a lie.”

“WAIT. HIS STATEMENT IS A LIE. BUT IF HE’S LYING ABOUT LYING, THEN DOES THAT MAKE IT A TRUTH?”

“Papyrus, no.”

“yes.”

“WHO DO I BELIEVE???”

You knew that you had to go out and get some more age-appropriate snacks. Papyrus’ bone-shaped crackers were not going to be a good combo for a kid who would’ve shoved as many as he could’ve down his throat. That and the recipe was specifically made for making sure that the skeletons were calcified all to hell, which might’ve been a little weird to feed a human child. Who knew what kind of repercussions would come out of that.

“Moo, follow me for a sec, okay?” You took him by the hoof – err, hand – and led him to the living room. He was already bouncing and looked restless. You had no clue when his last meal or snack was, but you weren’t ready to deal with the aftermath just yet.

It was kind of a crappy thing to do, but you needed some time to talk to the boys in private. So you flicked on the TV and let him busy himself with the mindless chatter of some educational cartoons.

“Okay, guys. We need a game plan.”

“EXCELLENT. I’LL GRAB MY JOURNAL. ONE MOMENT!” Papyrus rushed out of the room.

Every week Papyrus would pick his best meal from an array of dishes he cooked over the week, take about a day to create a photorealistic painting of it, and then put it on the wall to cover a wall safe full of his most precious treasures. The safe was your idea, so that the dog snooping around wouldn’t get into his figurines any more. Sans was the one who suggested switching out the cover so people wouldn’t get suspicious. Why that seemed logical, you would never know.

After snatching the book, Papyrus returned to the kitchen for your huddle. He was focused, pen in his gloved hand, eyesockets narrowed, ready to strike the page with copious notes and illustrations.

“whaddid you wanna talk about, babe?”

“Moo needs snacks, since you so graciously decided to relieve him of those.”

“yer welcome.”

You sniffed. “Anyways, I need you guys to run to the store and pick him up some stuff. I’ll keep an eye on him here while you’re gone.”

“OF COURSE. BRILLIANT. I WOULD EXPECT NOTHING LESS FROM MY OTHER HALF.” Papyrus dotted his i’s and crossed his t’s, his careful penmanship a marvel even from all the way where you stood. “I, FOR ONE, AM GLAD TO EXPLORE THE BELLY OF THE BEAST OTHERWISE KNOWN AS SOOPERSAVERS! THEY EVEN HAVE THEIR OWN SPICE AISLE. HOW EXCITING.”

“sure, we’ll get in and out in under twenty minutes.” Sans winked.

That mischievous look on his face was enough to put a wrench in your plans. “Okay, wait a second. I think I decided too fast. Papyrus, we can’t trust Sans to go with anyone to the store. Remember last time? He locked you in the freezer for an hour.”

Papyrus gasped. “OH, NO. I HAD ALMOST FORGOTTEN THOSE TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE MEMORIES!!! THE LOOK OF ABSOLUTE CONTEMPT ON THE CARTOON COWS’ FACES AS I RESTED AMONG THE DAIRY. THEY SILENTLY JUDGED MY BONE DENSITY AND TEMPTED ME WITH WHISPERS OF CALCIUM INFUSED DRINKS!!!”

Sans kept his downright devilish grin, causing a sweat to bead on his brother’s forehead.

“DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT, SANS.”

“well, you n’ me could go.” Sans swung himself up on the kitchen counter. You weren’t sure how he managed to do that given he was short as hell, but it was best not to question him and his casual abuse of physics. “my bro could stay here with the kid, and you’d make sure i was on my best behavior.”

“HMM, TRUE. THOUGH THAT WOULD LEAVE ME AT QUITE THE DISADVANTAGE, AS MOST OF MY ACTIVITIES REQUIRE THREE PEOPLE! WE ARE TRYING TO MAKE A GOOD FIRST IMPRESSION ON MOO, SANS.”

“That and we would never get anything done.” You left it at that. You weren’t going to sit there and give him the satisfaction of mentioning what happened on June 15th. You still had a scar in the shape of a bite mark that refused to go away, no thanks to him.

“WELL, WE COULD LEAVE SANS HERE ALONE AND DO THE SHOPPING BY OURSELVES.”

You and Papyrus exchanged looks, then burst out laughing. Yeah, right. The entire house would be in shambles by the time you got back.

“hey, i resent that…you’re completely right.”

You snorted. “Okay, so that’s one more option down. I guess this leaves one solution. Papyrus, Sans….are you two okay to stay here and watch Moo by yourselves for about an hour?”

Papyrus was quick to agree. Sans shrugged it off.

“WITH MY FAMILIARITY OF THE HOUSE, I WILL HAVE NO TROUBLE DEFENDING MYSELF FROM SANS’ PRANKS. AND WE WILL SURELY BE ABLE TO COMPLETE AT LEAST THREE PUZZLES WITH ALL OF US PARTICIPATING.”

“you gonna be ok buying groceries by yourself, babe?”

“I should be good. I’m more concerned about you guys. But if you’re sure you can handle it, then I would really, really appreciate it.”

They both perked up. Any mention of your approval sent a pleasant shiver through their bones. Mostly because they loved you so much that making you happy was probably one of the only goals they shared in life. (That and making sure they never missed an episode of the show all of you adored: Tales of the Aboveground, where monsters from all over shared their experiences of living on the surface.)

“THEN IT’S SETTLED. GOODBYE! WE WILL SEE YOU IN A BIT!”

“Hey, wait—”

You barely had a chance to get another word out before you were shoved outside the front door, your bag magically positioned on your shoulder and keys around your fingers. You wanted to give them some last minute advice, but the absolute Determination on their faces spoke volumes about their commitment to this. They would get through the morning without you and they weren’t going to take no for an answer.

Papyrus made sure to lock the door with a quick flick of his wrist, turning the small button on the knob despite your protests from outside. He sniffled.

“NYOO HOO HOO. I HATE TO LEAVE HER ON OUR DOORSTEP. BUT WE HAVE TO BE STRONG.”

“it’s ok.”

“YOU’RE RIGHT. MOO NEEDS US.” Papyrus stood to his full height and narrowed his eyes. “NOW…WHERE IS HE?”

Both paled.

“SANS ARE YOU TELLING ME WE ARE THIRTY-FIVE SECONDS INTO OUR DEBUT AS BABYSITTERS AND WE HAVE LOST THE CHILD???”

“relax, bro. he’s gotta be somewhere in the house.”

Both went silent for any clues. Aside from the gentle trickling of water upstairs, it was relatively peaceful.

Wait…

Trickling water?!

“THE BATHROOM! SANS!!!”

“what about it?”

“HE’S IN THERE! STOP TRYING TO DISTRACT ME! LET’S GO!!!”

Papyrus put his gloved hand on the railing and propelled himself upward the long flight of stairs, Sans trailing behind.

The closer they got to the top, the louder the noises became. Splashing and giggles. There were a million things that could’ve gone wrong when they opened the door, ninety-nine percent of which you would probably dump them for. And they weren’t going to let that happen.  

“MOO? ARE YOU IN THERE? I WOULD LIKE TO COME IN AND JOIN YOU!”

Papyrus jiggled the doorknob.

Locked.

“aw, shit.”

“SANS! WHAT DO WE DO?! WE HAVE NO ACCESS TO HIM! HE COULD BE DOING TERRIBLE THINGS IN THERE!”

“relax, bro. we made sure to turn off the water for the tub. we put on the special seat for the toilet, and all the medications are locked up. there’s nothin’ he could do from his height.”

At that perfect moment, both brothers looked down to see their feet sinking into a puddle of water creeping out from under the door.

Sans started to sweat.

“WELL, LOOKS LIKE THIS IS A JOB FOR MY IMMEASURABLE STRENGTH. STAND BACK, SANS!”

Papyrus readied himself at the door. The sheer power of his love for you would surely get him through.

“ONE….” He would be a hero!

“TWO…” You would be so impressed with his toddler caring skills!

“THREE!”

He went for a running start and the door opened.

“GGAAAAAAKKK!”

He dug his heels into the floor and braced himself for impact, doing his very best to stop his body from launching into the room. All he could see was a hundred scenarios that ended up in someone being injured, from a minor scrape to complete and utter annihilation. Maybe he was spending too much time with Undyne after all. His mind was getting to be far more dramatic than he would’ve liked for such a delicate situation.

As he poured his last ounce of strength into stopping dead in his tracks, the tip of his shoe caught on the rug Sans insisted that they place right outside the bathroom. The gross, musty one he picked up from a garage sale because he thought it was “a bargain”. Yeah, a big pile of disgustingness and a cheesy line! What kind of pun was, “make some room for dessert”???

Papyrus teetered forwards and went crashing down onto the floor. It didn’t hurt, but it was unpleasant to feel the stiff tufts of the rug’s fabric scraping against his bones. Dazed, he lifted his head just high enough to see the damage.

Moo had somehow tipped the trashcan over and stood up high enough for him to reach over to the sink. He had taken giant wads of toilet paper, coated them in water and soap, and then slapped the mushy mass all over the bathroom. On Papyrus self-portrait made of dry pasta. On the cute little figurines that you swore brought life to the place. And even on Sans’ joke book that had at least fifty unsanitary references!

With his consciousness fading and last mortified look, Moo took the toilet brush and brought it up to his mouth to sniff it.

Sans knew that his brother would be okay, but it was still hilarious to see him faint like that. He mostly did it when he overloaded on sensory things, which happened more often when Papyrus didn’t have his gloves on. But today it might’ve just been a combination of all new things plus the pretty disgusting state the bathroom was in.

Sans couldn’t be prouder of the little guy. Already destroying the grossest room in the entire house. Man, humans were fascinating already with their digestive systems, but all the tools and such used to help keep things civilized was enough to make him crack up. Seeing a little kid completely oblivious toward all of that and dismantling the entire polite system they had going on was amazing.

“kid, i think we’re gonna get along.”

He stuck his hand out, and was promptly given a slimy wad of tissue covered in snot.

“oh, man. that’s disgusting. i love it.”

Papyrus stirred from his unscheduled nap. He felt a little groggy, but the anxiety from before he passed out lingered long enough for him to snap back to reality. He sat up and rubbed at his eyesockets.

“SANS? MOO? ARE YOU BOTH HERE?”

The whole bathroom was in disarray. Papyrus couldn’t bear to look! He reached for the door handle and made sure he didn’t have to subject his eyes to any more torture.

Papyrus happened to glance down at his chest while he pulled himself up from the floor. Pinned to his chest, along the pillow armor that had been fitted on him somehow, was a simple note.

_count to ten, then see if you can find us_

“I AM NOT PLAYING THIS GAME!” he shouted. “OH, WAIT. THERE IS ANOTHER MESSAGE WRITTEN ON THE BACK OF THE PAPER.” He turned it over.

_you gotta. if you’re still not convinced, flip me over again_

“WHAT!!!” Papyrus did as he was told.

_wait, how does this paper have three sides? anyway, if you don’t do it i’ll trash your room. love, your bro_

“I HATE THIS!!!!” And, against his better judgment… “ONE, TWO, THREE…”

After ten agonizing seconds, Papyrus made his way downstairs. He found a trail of flour leading to the backdoor, at least five toys strewn across the floor, some plastic utensils wedged between the couch cushions, and the phone was off the hook with someone shouting on the other line.

“HELLO?” Papyrus scrambled for the phone, managing to wrestle it up to his face despite the long retro cord being tangled up in knots. “YOU HAVE REACHED THE HOME OF THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HIS EQUALLY GREAT LADY, AND ONE LAZY BROTHER, HOW CAN I ASSIST YOU?”

“Paps? It’s me. Is everything okay?”

His breath caught in his throat. Somehow. “AH!!! YES, EVERYTHING IS GOING GREAT!” He started to sweat. “HOW IS THE STORE? HAVE YOU FOUND PRODUCTS AT REASONABLE AND UNBEATABLE PRICES?”

“I think so. I’m in line right now, but there’s only one cashier and he looked like a new hire. He’s paging the empty store for someone to do a price check on Mettamuffins. Oh my god. Now he’s panicking.”

“THIS STORY IS INCREDIBLY INTERESTING AND DOWNRIGHT SCANDALOUS, BUT I HAVE SOME…THINGS…TO ATTEND TO.”

“Hmm. Are you _sure_ you’re doing okay?”

He nearly cracked, but didn’t. “OF COURSE WE AM! I MEAN, OF COURSE I ARE! I WILL JUST HAVE TO MAKE SURE I CLEAN UP SOME OF OUR…ACTIVITIES! GOOD LUCK ON CHECKING OUT YOUR ITEMS! SMOOCH!!!”

He hung up and heard a quiet snicker in the room.

“SANS, I KNOW YOU’RE IN HERE. THIS CHILD’S PRESENCE HAS MADE YOU EVEN MORE…CHILDISH!!! PLEASE COME OUT OF HIDING, SHE IS COMING BACK SOON AS WE NEED TO FIX THIS PLACE UP!”

No answer.

Papyrus crossed his arms and thought deeply on where his brother would be hiding. His favorite spot to snooze in as of late was the closet near the front door. But it didn’t look like that side of the house had been touched just yet. Sans also liked to roll under the couch and sleep under the comfortable weight of the cushions, but when he did that, he almost always managed to kick one slipper off. No sign of that.

As he rubbed his chin thoughtfully, a small droplet of liquid splashed against the top of his skull.

“…SANS!!!”

“heh heh. ya got me.”

Papyrus looked up and put his hands on his hips. Sans had somehow crawled up to the corner of the ceiling and was wedged up there.

“WHERE IS MOO?”

“around here. told him to hide.”

“WE NEED TO BE WATCHING HIM!”

Sans slipped down the length of the wall without batting an eye. “ok, ok. i told him to hide in my room. let’s check it out.”

The trek toward the brothers’ bedrooms was long and arduous, filled with slick spots of melting sticks of butter and granola. A gross combination, and Papyrus wasn’t even sure how he managed to get access to more food. So much for locking everything up. But despite the harsh terrain, both brothers persisted until they reached Sans’ safe haven.

“hey, bro. what’re you doing? knock first.”

“THERE IS NO TIME FOR FORMALITIES. MOO, I AM COMING IN!”

The stench was unbearable. Dirty clothes lying haphazardly on the floor. A lampshade on the floor. Cloudy test tubes stacked on top of each other. Crumpled bedsheets, pillows stained with coffee and tea, a plate caked with mysterious gray mold. The entire place looked like it had seen the wrath of a certain three-year-old.

“everythin’ looks normal to me.”

“OH MY GOD. THE SMELL IS EVEN WORSE THAN IT WAS THIS MORNING!”

“oh yeah. i forgot to put this back in the fridge.” Sans picked up a cup of milk that already started to bubble in the smoldering, stuffy summer heat. “was gonna see if i could ferment this, but figured it’d be better to start another day.”

“DO YOU SEE HIM?”

“nope. call him.”

“MOOOOOOO!”

Sans’ eyesockets crinkled. “bro, are you part cow?”

“NO.”

“because that impression was _moo-_ ving.”

“STOP THIS.”

Then they heard it. A gasp. It was faint, but it was there.

“IS THAT…THE ATTIC???”

How did one child manage to maneuver around so easily? Humans were so tenacious! Neither of them could imagine raising one of their own if they were all like this!

“MOOOOOO!”

“moooo.”

It was dark. How did he even navigate? When you moved in with the brothers, there was so much extra stuff that it was all shoved up here. You and Sans promised to sort through it, but every time you were both up here at the same time, you ended up just making a giant mess and leaving it worse off than when you came.

Papyrus nearly tripped over a giant chest full of early courting gifts from him. You said they needed to be kept in a safe place, and that they were priceless, so they had to be stored away. He believed you wholeheartedly, because you had wrapped them up in the softest blankets to shield them from dust and time. That and he caught you sneaking up here sometimes just to admire them.

“bro, did you hear that?”

“HEAR WHAT?”

Sans froze. His eyesockets went dark.

“we’ve been cornered.”

Jumping out from the shadows, fingers splayed and mouth opened wide, was Moo.

“Raaaah!”

Both of the brothers were surprised, but did their best not to laugh. A tiny human in a cow costume roaring at them like a dinosaur was…probably the best thing they’d seen in weeks. It didn’t help that Moo charged toward them, bending down on all fours, the tiny tail sewn on his backside flapping with every bounce toward them.

“PLEASE DON’T HURT US!” Papyrus cried.

But it was too late. Moo had conquered them both, crawling on top of their toppled bodies and declaring himself as the winner with a loud, long roar.

“alright, kiddo. let’s get you back downstairs.” Sans plucked him off his chest and tucked him under an arm. “you gave us a big scare.”

“YOU COULD HAVE HURT YOURSELF…” Papyrus began. But after seeing the near teary look in Moo’s eyes, he recanted. “YOU WERE VERY BRAVE TO COME UP HERE BY YOURSELF. BUT NEXT TIME YOU SHOULD PLAY NEAR US, OKAY? WE WANT TO SEE MOO THE DINOSAUR UP CLOSE!”

All three of them headed back to the living room where Moo’s giant bag still sat untouched.

“I HAVE A COLORING BOOK I THINK YOU WOULD LIKE.”

“Crayons, please!”

“nice job, kid. use yer manners and you’ll get far.”

“I SHOULD WASH HIS CLOTHING IN A FEW HOURS. HE LOOKS STICKY. OR IS THAT NORMAL FOR HIS AGE?”

Everything was okay after that. Some minor incidents – like Moo breaking a crayon and then throwing a tantrum despite being given the exact same color to use instead. The brothers had to muster up all their patience to deal with his screams and flailing limbs, but they managed to get him to stop wailing after a while.

In the end, the house was completely trashed, but everyone was safe and sound.

You parked the car in the driveway and rummaged through the bag, grabbing a piece of candy to shove in your mouth. Ugh. What was supposed to be a quick trip to the store ended up being the biggest nightmare of your life. Long lines, rude customers, unorganized shelves, a clown blocking your nearest exit until you donated to his law school fund, and even a broken traffic light that resulted in a twenty-minute detour through a funeral motorcade.

Needless to say, you were relieved to be home.

After gathering everything in your arms, you headed to the door. A smarter person would’ve called the brothers to let them know that you were here, but you were so exhausted that the thought never even crossed your mind.

Knock. Knock.

“who’s there?”

“Sans.”

“sans who?”

“Sans, please let me in, my arms are going numb!”

“i don’t get it.”

“PERHAPS THE HUMOR LIES IN THE REALISM.”

“oh, ok.”

You heard him unlatch the door and you practically burst in. “Someone please help me get these to the kitchen!”

Papyrus did more than that. He simply scooped you up, bags and all, so that you were no longer crumbling under their crushing weight. You were relieved to receive help, but gosh, it did bring a little color to your cheeks when he easily carted you around like that.

He set you down in the middle of the kitchen. Without hesitation, you made your way into the fridge and started shoving all sorts of snacks inside.

“So? How did it go, guys?”

Sans grinned. “eh, so boring.”

“What, really?”

“IT WAS…NEW.”

You peered over the fridge door. “I don’t know if I like the sound of that. Where’s Moo?”

“NAPPING ON THE COUCH.”

“Wait, you guys actually got him to sleep?”

“he was kinda giving us a run for our money, so it’s nice he decided to help us out with that.”

“Oh, no. Was he a handful?”

“heh. you decide.”

You blinked and stepped away from your little comfort zone, only to fully drink in how destroyed the house was.

Yeah, it looked like a toddler had been through here, all right. Everyone’s possessions poked and prodded. Annoying Dog even had a balloon strapped to its tail, trying its best to run away from it as it hovered menacingly over its back. The walls had some minor scribbles here and there, the carpet had splotches of (what you hoped was washable) paint, there were scraps of paper and a pair of kid scissors scattered along the floor, and even Moo’s stuffed cow was completely soaked.

“Do I want to know?”

“not really.”

“WE HAD FUN, THOUGH.”

You sighed, relieved, and smiled at them. Your chest even felt a little tight. Ew, you were about to get sappy on them. Sugar overload.

“Thanks, guys. I’m really glad.”

“NOW YOU CAN HELP US WATCH OVER MOO FOR THE REST OF THE DAY!”

“yep.” Munch. “might as well include you on the fun. ‘sides, you haven’t even seen how he pronounced the word ‘fantastic’.” Swallow.

“…why would he even say that in the first place?” you ventured. “Wait, never mind. The point is. You two were a huge help. I couldn’t have done this without you, and…I’m really looking forward to the rest of Moo’s visit if I have both of you here with me.”

Papyrus’ eyesockets sparkled. Sans was embarrassed, but shot you a cheesy grin anyway.

“Alright, when he wakes up, I’ll make him a snack plate. Sans, can you stop eating for a sec and hand me the Frooty Tooties?”

“uh…whoops.”

**Author's Note:**

> [ **donate to me!** ](https://ko-fi.com/1606VSUKPT64C)


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